so i was stressing about all the stuff i have to do before our miss stella gets here…lets be honest…freaking out about the unknown…and the boy named paul reminded me how since we got through my jaw surgery…we could get through anything…then i remembered it has been exactly 1 year since i broke my face…so i went through my pictures and my posts…and i can’t believe how far i have come…so here is a little trip through my memory lane. (this is kinda of long…but i really wanted it recorded so that i won’t forget it…it was so challanging but so rewarding at the same time. Heavenly Father seriously knows what’s up for each of us.)

this i me 2.5 years ago…if you look closely you can see my small square teeth, my really gummy smile,and that my teeth are not centered with the rest of my face…in reality my jaw was off balance 1.5 inches combined…giving my the most awful headaches and migraines…(i hadn’t chewed gum in 4 years because it just hurt.) + my doctor said i was going to loose my teeth because the way i was breathing because i couldn’t close my mouth ( i was killing all my gum tissue.)

Here i am after my first surgery, a double gum graph and gum removal on 13 of my teeth. They took about .5″ of length off my front teeth. Look at the difference…believe me i was smiling the exact same way. It was a week of liquids…not too bad…

then came the big one…the morning of the surgery i remember being so scared that they could get an IV in me…they had to give me something to chill out. my boy named paul was with me holding my hand and being my rock,,,man i love that boy. Here i am 2 hours after surgery. i was so out of it…i just remember going in and out…waking up because it felt like my face was on fire, and knowing that my paulie, my parents, paul’s mom were there…trying to talk to me. i learned that dr master took both jaws completely out of my face sawed off 7mm off the top realigned a screwed it back in, then took a total of 1/2″ from the width of my bottom jaw and realigned and then 1/2″ out of my chin so i would look like big chin jay. I was under 5.5 hours for this. the day after he came in and pricked my with a needle all over my face to check if i had lost any of my feeling of face…i had all feeling…though i was numb in spots until about 3 months after my surgery.

i was so excited to go home and not be in that hospital anymore. i had lost so much blood, i couldn’t stand, walk or anything. i lived on a couch for 4 weeks. i hated that i had to have everything done for me…i couldn’t got to the bathroom or shower by myself for 3 weeks. sleeping was impossible. i had to sleep sitting up becuase i couldn’t put pressure on any part of my face…and i would wake up every 2 hours because it hurt so bad…trying to force 5 oz of ensure down so i could take my pain meds. Paulie was amazing…never complaining and telling me i was pretty even though my lips looked like balloon animals and my face looked like a beach ball. I have always known he loved me…but the 3 months after my surgery he def. proved it.

i was so scared the first day when paulie went back to work all day…but he thought of everything…i had my station right next to me that would last the whole day…(i was lucky to get 300 calories down a day) i had so much support it was amazing…my family and friends were there every step…coming just to keep me company so i wouldn’t loose my mind.

everything i ate had to be able to go through this guy…for 19 days…then i got to eat things like pudding and apple sauce…and oh and yummy mashed potatoes. i didn’t have solid food for 5 weeks…i lost 30 lbs through the whole thing.

7 weeks later this is as big has my smile could get…i had to retrain my face muscles to do everything. i was feeling way better then…

here i am 4 months later and feeling amazing…i can eat…i can sleep…doctors said i healed so fast. wow look how long my hair was…

a year later…i haven’t had headache since, i feel so good, and blessed…and i can honestly say that it was so worth it. i still have people think i am my sister or not even know who i am…i can’t wait to hear what my children will say when they are old enough to realize that i don’t look the same as i did.

what a crazy year…hopefully this next year won’t be as insane..but have just as many blessings…thanks to all who supported me this past year…you are amazing! peace friends! heidi lynn